Poll: Is it okay to have sex if you're a guest in someone's home?

Are you having sex with your host(ess)? That has to be right.

Are you having sex with the spouse of your host(ess)? That is wrong unless he or she invited you to. Like the eskimos do.

Are you having sex with your host(ess)'s minor child, pet, or houseplant? I think that is pretty much always wrong.

What if the houseplant was really asking for it?

Dangit, I can't think up a funny responce to your question that doesn't come across as super-creepy.

i'm pretty sure you cant get any more super-creepy than the question itself :P

I can't think of anything creepier in this thread than the words "sex towel."

If it has flowers it's totally asking for it.

....FLORAL RAPE!

so that would make said plant, deflowered.

BAAAAHHHHH!!!!! HAHAHAHAH!

Are you having sex with your host(ess)? That has to be right.

Yep that was the first thing I was thinking of...

And yes sodomizing the young puppy is wrong :D

unless you mean creepy for the people that actually live in the house :D

What she said.

A sex towel? Man, that makes me want to invent a new position and call it the 42.

or just add it to the list of usefull applications of said towel :P

"you can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapours; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a mini raft down the slow heavy river Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or to avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (a mindboggingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you�daft as a brush, but very, very ravenous); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.

...Lastly, you can use it to clean up after you sodomize your host/hostess's houseplants in a rude and creepy manner."

:D

Now really though, how can you sodomize a houseplant? Merriam-Webster lists the definition of sodomy as:

1 : copulation with a member of the same sex or with an animal
2 : noncoital and especially anal or oral copulation with a member of the opposite sex

A houseplant is not an animal, and it has no mouth or anus, so therefore it cannot be sodomized, IMO.

What about a venus fly trap?

i was gonna bring that up, but my brain quit halfway through the entire response. :P

eta: really, i only said "sodomize" the "houseplants" because it was kind of an accumulation of the jokes running through this thread.

I am proud of myself for starting a discussion of sex with houseplants. That's sad isn't it?

see i think it's hysterical. Geoff had to go and drop the ball on the running thread tho, by interjecting reality into it.

"plants dont have buttholes to sodomize" indeed. :P

Well they don't!

Yeah, but you can still have sex with this mushroom

I am never, ever clicking that link.

A kid in my high school hygiene class had sex with a ficus. He misunderstood what the teacher meant when he said "always use a rubber."

Booo!

Hey, does anyone remember the late 70's TV show "Quark," with Richard Benjamin. It had a character named Ficus.

I have all the episodes on VHS.

She said she loved me... :(

i totally thought gordon wrote this one. especially after seeing the phrase "sex towel."

hee.

towel.

yeah and then you find out that it's twisted little me!

seriously, this is a question i wonder about! Okay, so what if you are staying with your SO at their parents' house? Is it okay then? What about when you're staying with your SO as a guest in YOUR parents' house? What about when you're house-sitting and you have the house to yourself?

Wow you asked about sex and expected us to not make stupid jokes like seventh graders.

omg, i'm WAY more mature than YOU then.

..*I* make stupid jokes like a *9th* grader.

That's because girls mature faster than boys.

so by the time i'm your age, i'll be teasing on a 12th grade level, and you'll still be back at like, 8.

hey!


:D

see, you're already more mature than all of us combined at this point :P

hey!


:D

..is for horses!

but better for cows, pigs would eat it but they don't know how.

(yes, I know it's complete nonsense, but it's how I learned it!)

What about when you're house-sitting and you have the house to yourself?

I don't see any problems with that. Seriously. Why not? Timing might be critical though - If your parents return just in the moment when you're having hot sex in teh kitchen you might have some explaining to do ...

I'm amazed that 16 people have said it was too creepy.

I mean, I kinda assumed the question implied you had your own room or whatever..... I guess I could see it being too weird or creepy if you were all in the same room. :D

Maybe I'm a prude...it's just rude/creepy to me. I certainly wouldn't in someone else's house.� I can't really explain why, it just feels wrong.� Like you can't have self control enough to wait until you're not in someone else's space. I'd also be creeped out if I knew someone was doing it as a guest in my house.

I can't defend that opinion with any specific logic or fact or whatever...it's just how things feel to me. To me it's a thing best kept on your own premises (or those you're paying for, e.g. hotels).

i agree andrea, heck, i even feel weird about the issue if it's my (or my SO's) house and we have have guests.

Then again, what you don't know can't hurt you. If I never know it's going on, it's not creepy.

if you were all in the same room.

I'd call it a challenge :D

I'd call it FruCon

No sex in the orgy room!

No on ever invites me to orgies.

What's sad is that I've said that on FHDC before.

You've said it in may places, IIRC

I'm proud of you. This has possibly turned into the creepiest thing I've ever read in my life. I really feel like I need to take a shower.

...Though I don't know whether or not it's because I feel dirty or horny. :o/