| I'm at university now (lucky enough to be studying music) spreading the word about all sorts of marvellous Canadian, folk, comedy, and eclectic music, and various permutations of all four.
The university is in New Brunswick. While I had a ball at FruCon 4, I don't foresee being able to attend again for a while. *sigh*
* * *
Music is one of the consuming passions of my life. I am interested in music of almost any sort, including but not limited to classical, folk, rock, opera, and jazz. I sing alto and play flute, recorder, pennywhistle, harmonica, piano, accordion; guitar and saxophone
to a lesser extent; I read music, but also find it thrilling and educational to play by ear and improvise. I love trying to improvise harmony, but am not polished at it yet.
My other consuming passions are theatre and (mostly Canadian) comedy. I'm too shy to act, and can only act as "straight man" where comedy is concerned. Perhaps a connection may be drawn there.
* * *
Musicians are so witty!
Moxy Fruvous is so witty!
Mariposa Folk Festival
Jian [re: sponsor sign]: We are...the New VR!
Ottawa Folk Festival
[Jian got the Arrogant Worms to roleplay his bosses]
Trevor: [looking out blankly at the audience]...Uh...hi.
Jian: The quiet boss. He doesn't even acknowledge his employee.
Chris: You're a nice piece!
Jian: The lascivious boss! He knows what he wants!
Mike: [gesturing at audience] You're all fired!
Jian: [later in the workshop] ...but apparently we've got nice asses!
[the Worms cheer]
* * *
James Keelaghan is so witty!
Flying Cloud Folk Club, TRANZAC
"It's KeeloRequest! All requests, all night!"
Stewart Park Festival, July 2001
"I'm opening for The Arrogant Worms!"
* * *
Wendell Ferguson is so witty!
Brampton Folk Festival, June 15, 2002
"Oooh... When I get out the harmonica, people suddenly respect me more."
* * *
The Arrogant Worms are so witty!
[I wait for Mike to finish a conversation before asking for an autograph]
Mike: Oh, don't worry about it, we're not busy. Just stick it in there and ask!
[on following "The Kids Song"]
Trevor: Well, there's not much we can do to compare with creepy Fruvous kids...
Barrie, December 2000
[re: playing in a theatre/lecture hall with two sections blocked off]
Chris: We used those two other seating sections too, but they're for later...the showgirls!
Mike: Mel Lastman...or, as I like to call him: Dad.
Tottenham, April 2001
[Chris shows off the "Trees!" action excessively]
Trevor: And some people do that without the benefit of torsos!
Mike: ...Give a torso today. Sign the card. Save a life.
[a Corky & the Juice Pigs reference?]
Worms: And the dog goes...
Audience member: Bark!
Mike: Bark? Do dogs actually make that sound? "I am a Shakespearean dog. Bark, I say unto thee, bark and anon bark again."
[after a lengthy discussion of the parquet/"Parkay" flooring]
Mike: Ya salty margarine!
Chris: Yeah, like we couldn't see that one coming.
Mike: I'm sweating my brains out here!
Trevor: That shirt used to be white.
[Mike "pulls" bits of his brains out]
Mike: There goes my Masters!
Mike: Oh! [motion] Spatial reasoning!
[virutally no audience response]
Chris [quietly]: Sometimes, it's just for us.
Harbourfront, Canada Day 2001
Chris: [referring to flag on a ship] Le garcon de jouer!
[long pause]
Trevor: Oh...Playboy! There's the product of a good Ontario education!
Mike: Yeah! If it ain't broke, Mike Harris, don't fix it!
Stewart Park Festival, July 2001
Worms: You got in free, and we're going to give you your money's worth.
Mike: James Keelaghan gave you a performance worth at least seven dollars, and we're taking that back.
Trevor: With interest.
[upon receiving bouquets from Stacey]
Mike: I feel like a figure skater!
Trevor [face lighting up]: She says I'm the smartest!
[I tell Mike how many shows I've seen]
Mike: Wow! We should give you frequent flyer miles!
[re: bizarre chandelier-thingamajig at Legion]
Chris: Check. Check. Check. Is that a crown of thorns? Check.
[The Legion was set up as a huge dance floor. Chris found a puffy headband on stage. He put it on his leg, turned around, tossed it out into the audience...]
Chris [falsetto]: Get it, girls!
New Year's Eve, 2001/2002
[someone tosses cows with wings up onto the stage after "I Am Cow"]
Trevor: Go free! [tosses his into the air]
[*thunk*; pause]
Mike: It's a Canada 3000 cow!
[re: cows]
Trevor: It says "Press Here"
Chris: I should stick that on *my* stomach!
Chris: I've got 35 minutes to be immature!
[Mike wore shiny pleather pants for the second set]
Chris: [intro to "A Man Has Needs"]...We'd like to touch you.... Mike, get your pants away from those women!
Mike [with Reader's Digest Merry Christmas Songbook]: ...it's a Reader's Digest book so it's only got the first two lines of each song--
"O Holy Night, the stars are brightly"...?
[Chris puts his pointy birthday hat over his eye; no one notices Mike's "It's a hook!"]
Trevor: [to Chris] Oh, act your age!
Mike: [re: filming "Carrot Juice Is Murder" in Brantford]
Actually, we filmed here because we didn't have to get a permit. So to rub it in, we filmed in a field right beside the police station.
[something from the others about how they wouldn't care]
Mike: [in dumb voice] "Oh look, people filming. This town is bouncing back! We should get that casino built!"
Mike: [re: Brantford] Also, my parents met here. They met at COCKSHOT! That's a word that just has to be yelled. COCKSHOT!
[dramatic pause between quiet songs]
[one person blows a horn noisemaker]
Trevor: Well, that's a way to ruin the mood!
[re: the audience's noisemakers]
Chris: This band sucks!
Trevor or Mike: Somebody finally beat us!
Mike: No animals were harmed in the making of these pants. No cloth was harmed in the making of these pants....100% pure synthetic goodness!
Chris: I thought you said those pants would explode at midnight.
Hugh's Room, June 1, 2002
[Chris and Trevor have just explained that they only had to take the streetcar and walk a bit to get to the show.]
Mike: I drove. The streetcar doesn't go up that far.
Trevor: If we'd gotten the Olympics, it would've!
Chris: Well, it's great to be back at the Air Canada Centre! We're Creed.
[all three do unflattering Creed impressions]
Chris: What puzzles me is that all the tables are taken except for those two on the side [gestures at far left and far right tables in front row]
Trevor: I guess people know that we're a bad band in profile.
Mike: In fact, we're completely two-dimensional, as our music will attest.
Chris: We got two "woo!"s already. I guess we're done. We can go home now.
Mike: So we went to a hotbed of Celtic culture, we went to Oshawa
All: Aye! Oshawa!
Chris or Trevor: The Schwa!
(Okay, so I get a kick out of this because I took linguistics last year.)
Holmes Hook comes up onstage to introduce them again. He's standing in Mike's place.
Holmes: So I guess this is [macho voice] Daddy Worm!
[he moves to Trevor's stand, really has to lean down]
[squeaky voice] Baby Worm! and...
[moves to Chris's stand, pauses]
and...[matriarchal] Mama Worm!
[Worms come onstage. Chris is getting his bass ready]
Mike: How're you doing, Mama Worm?
Trevor [squeaky]: This microphone is toooo big!
During the final verse of "I Ran Away", Trevor makes his right hand into a "devil" puppet shape (middle and ring finger touching thumb), and is just starting to "mouth" along with "Mike, you're next!" when Mike notices him and cracks up.
[after much carrying-on, giggling, and Satanic pronouncements from Trevor, they finally continue the song]
Mike: I came up to the devil!
Trevor: BLEAAAGH!
Mike: I poked the devil on...the knuckle!
Trevor: You probably didn't know this, but I'm also offering a workshop on "Hand Puppetry Without Puppets". Sign up at the door. Join me.
Chris: There'd be no more Creed if everybody had a gun!
Chris: You get yerself one a' those [etc.] and I'll get you a place in the Prime Minister's cabinet, and tell Jean Chretien that you're campaigning against him!
[after song]
Mike: Ooh, cutting political satire from Chris Patterson. He's auditioning for Air Farce!
Chris: I'm the next Luba.
[Chris has been goofing off, distracting audience attention from Trevor's song intro]
Trevor: You don't always have to be the centre of attention!
Brampton Folk Festival, June 15, 2002
[The festival was moved indoors due to rain.]
Mike: I apologize to those I've blinded with the reflection off my pasty white knees. Trust me, it would be worse outside. | 
