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Your dream.. mate

   Discussion: Your dream.. mate
Annika · 19 years ago
What do you find attractive in someone? Personality? Looks? Voice? Etc. What do you look for in a b/f - g/f?
Annika Back · 19 years ago

The person of my dreams would have a good sense of humor, willing to try just about anything, someone who doesn't mind going to coffee with me at 3am to just sit and write. Someone kind, but not a pushover. *sigh*

I think that's what I've decided I want, but than I've had many ideas of who my dream person would be, and they've all flopped, when I found that person.

J. Andrew World Back · 19 years ago
I look for someone like my girlfreind I currently have.  Like I always say, I know she isn't perfect, but she is perfect for me!
Lisa SnuggleQueen Back · 19 years ago
i just want someone who will put up with me. *grin* that's all i ask.

lisa (:
Sarah Back · 19 years ago
Sense of humor, good looks are a plus but not the major priority, smart, gorgeous eyes, someone who is into doing things randomly. Also has to be the same religion as me (very important), likes kids, supportive of my dreams and can make me happy when I feel down.

Even though he was a real jerk, the one thing that really stands out about my last boyfriend (other than he looked like a 25 year-old George Clooney ala Perfect Storm) was one conversation we had. I was having one of these freak-out periods where I felt like I had to have my entire life mapped out. He said that if you freak out over the future you will never enjoy the present and you'll miss opportunities that may just come up out of the blue. Really feel that was actually one of the best things I've heard in a long time. Something I keep thinking of whenever I feel like things aren't working out.

no one · 19 years ago
Thank you, Anni, you have made Random Drivel an even better feature of this site than it already is.

Ordinary topics, such as "Your dream.. mate" must be in just about everybody's mind somewhere in the background.

It takes someone to ask the question, (nevermind the lack of verb or question mark,) to prompt some of us into examining some notions we vaguely hold, only to be steered into unexpected insights.

Meet my dream.. mate.

We feel intimate, meaning we understand each other's point of view, without necessarily agreeing.

We argue about differences between our beliefs and opinions constructively.

We share simultaneous streaks of optimism and cynicism.

We are near, yet allow as much space as is needed.

We can make the other understand where we have made ourselves an idiot.

You might wonder where sex and good looks come in. Well, they are a big bonus, but sex is a trick of nature that will diminish over some years during a relationship and good looks wilt in time. Give me the preceeding characteristics for a dream mate anytime. They last, given some effort.

Ah, there she is! "Who", you ask? I dare not say.
Andrea Krause · 19 years ago
Well right now I'm as close to my dream as I've ever been. :)

Biggest things I look for are intelligence and a good sense of humour. The ability to love me when I'm silly (quite often) and when I'm depressed (pretty often as well). Looks are less important but I do have a thing for glasses. Geeks (with social skills) with glasses. Yummmm. :)

Current boy only wears reading glasses but as the years go on I'm sure more will be needed. *grin*
Songbill Back · 19 years ago
Confidence is so important. Someone who is not constantly apologizing for themselves or their accomplishments. Someone who can accept a compliment. If I'm going to like someone, I also want them to like themselves. It's not arrogance, though.

Glasses are good, too.
It's a girl! Back · 19 years ago
right back at ya, andy!  Yeah,  I think we compliment each other nicely. My strengths balance out your weaknesses and vice versa. We're a good team.
Sara Woodward Back · 19 years ago
aww! :)
zil Back · 19 years ago

What do you find attractive in someone? Personality? Looks? Voice? Etc. What do you look for in a b/f - g/f?

mmpht... I don't look for anything.... and I don't have any "standards"...

it would be good if they enjoy zaneiness. adam was ashamed of me when I yelled MAN OVER BOARD!! and ran over to put the head back on a manicin that fell over in the mall... I then performed CPR...

it would be awesome if they didn't lie.

it would be great if they were smarter than a sprig of broccoli.

it would be wonderbar if they would snuggle me when I was scared.

it would be catywompical if they weren't immature little boys in side.

... and hey. if they live in ohio and have a rat named buttercup? SCORE! ;-)


Annika Back · 19 years ago
Ooooh!! Wait, you're claiming Talcott?! *does a little dance.....*
Annika Back · 19 years ago
Awww!!! I now want Andy.
Laura P. Back · 19 years ago
"Catywompical"! You are my favorite person of the day!
J. Andrew World Back · 19 years ago
You can spell and eat healthy, and I am outgoing and creative!  You are my insparation, my muse and my love!  I never knew I was missing anything in my life and then you showed up and I saw what was missing.  I love you!  *shuts up before Ellen dies of Embarrisment*
J. Andrew World Back · 19 years ago
Sorry you never got a chance ;)
Annika Back · 19 years ago
Lisa Kay Back · 19 years ago
awww. Lisa, I think you're hot shit! move to Seattle and I'll date you! *grin*
Lisa Kay · 19 years ago
-dances - swing ideally (or has started learning)
-musician (type doesn't matter too too much but ideally something I can sing along with)
-geek (with enough social skills to be taken out in public)
-safe (someone I can express my fears and bad experiences with comfortably)
-smart & educated (yes this sounds awefully conceited but I've found from experience that when I date people who are smart but can't follow technical conversations I lose interest)

now if I just followed these criteria when I picked people to date my relationships would last longer!
Lisa SnuggleQueen Back · 19 years ago
get me a job and we'll talk. *wink* :D
Sarah Back · 19 years ago
My aunt used to say that it's good to have someone you can be seen in a well-lit room with. Just read the geek line and something about it made me think of what my aunt used to say.
zil Back · 19 years ago
"claiming talcott?!"

erm.... *zilpha is spooked and runs away at the thought of something so serious*
Eri Back · 19 years ago
No! Mine! *wraps arms around Lis* MY sexy girl! *pout*
Lisa SnuggleQueen Back · 19 years ago
ok, you get me a job and we'll talk. *grin*
Eri Back · 19 years ago
I'll start on that right away!
Eri Back · 19 years ago

What skills do you have? :P

beth-pseudocanuck! Back · 19 years ago

i have a *huge* wire-rim glasses fetish. ok, maybe fetish is a bit strong. but i am hugely attracted to almost any guy with wire-rim glasses. the last 5ish guys i dated all had wire-rims. mmmmmmm. it's kind of a known thing, too--my mom will nudge me and nod toward a wire-rimmed waiter when we're out to friends will point guys out....etc. :) it's pretty funny.

to answer the actual question, INTELLIGENCE is huge. big issues with that here at UNH, unfortunately. i'll throw in kindness, humor, and the ability to chill AND be a bit "zany" at times...and the ability to appreciate--if not share--my passion for things...beth doesn't half-ass anything. i either do it well, or don't bother. similar tastes in music helps, since my favorite thing to do on weekends is dinner and a good show.

*sigh* unfortunately, i'm almost convinced that such a man--even one who comes close--doesn't exist. at least not within a reasonable distance from me. if anyone in the boston/northern new england area knows of anyone who fits this description, then by all means, i'm open to blind dates! :)

J. Andrew World Back · 19 years ago
Too bad I am taken, I have glasses, Inteligent and have a sence of humor! ;)  But I have the best girlfreind in the world, so atlast you missed your chance!
It's a girl! Back · 19 years ago
Lisa SnuggleQueen Back · 19 years ago
i'm young and i'm cute, what more do you need? *grin*

lisa (:
Eri Back · 19 years ago

I meant skills that would get you a job, silly. ;) Doesn't take anything to prove your worth to me.

Shelly · 19 years ago
well....hrm.......let's see.......

looks are a good thing, but looks are relative and my 'type' isn't necessarily one that others find attractive.....

my main things are intelligence, sense of humor, being able to be silly, compassion, warmth...caring....especially the importance of family is a big thing for me. adaptibilty...elasticity{not physical}....rolling with the punches...etc.....being comfortable with/in front of a group, yet also sweet and comfortable when not.

i guess all the usual, ya know?

and the good voice works, too.

now i just hafta get up the courage to approach this person....if...he existed.....which....i of course know he does....and...someday....;)

Zach Back · 19 years ago
I've found someone who complements me to a degree that I originally believed was impossible. She's extremely intelligent and open-minded. She's always ready and willing to learn new things, and she'll never refuse knowledge. She has an absolutely fantastic appreciation of language. She truly absorbs Shakespeare, J.D. Salinger, Sylvia Plath, and all the rest of my very favorite authors.

Every time I talk to her, I am left in complete awe at her ability to make me feel like a better person. She recognizes things about me that not even I noticed before. She has an uncanny propensity for erasing any type of pain from my mind. For this reason, I've dubbed her with the latin pet name, Specula. It means "little light of hope".

To me, Amy is absolutely perfect. I have never met someone so gorgeous in so many ways. There are just a few small complications that make our situation incredibly difficult.

1. She lives over 600 miles away from me

2. She's dating my best friend

"I am Fortune's fool."
J. Andrew World Back · 19 years ago
NO don't die!  I might have to perform Mouth to Mouth on you!  And I know I have to remove any restrictive clothing, so it all has to go!  Besides if you die, I don't know what I would do, it would be like loosing a leg. 

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